As you may already know, breaking a pornography addiction is not easy, and the majority of methods which claim to break a porn habit often fail.
Why is this?
As I have said earlier, I have tried many methods, and all of them failed miserably. In my understanding, the reason why these methods fail is because fundamentally, these methods use willpower as a means to break porn addiction.
The use of willpower to break pornography addiction
The majority of products out there which claim to break a pornography addiction use the method of willpower, and they advise strict actions.
These methods may work for few days, but after few days, one relapses. The strength of the relapse will be directly proportional to the efforts they made to control themselves to stay away from porn. If they put in a great effort to control themselves, then they’ll rival that with the amount of porn they end up watching for relief from such a tough challenge.
This method rarely works for breaking a pornography addiction for the majority of people. It does work for few, but for the vast majority, it simply fails.
Using the technique called “too much supply” to break pornography addiction
I have also gone through some methods which claim to break pornography addiction by using the core technique called, “too much supply”. Compared to above method, only a fraction of anti-porn materials advocate this.
In this method, the porn addict is asked to watch as much porn as they wants, and then much more. If a porn addict usually watches porn for 2 hours daily, this method advises the porn addict to watch 6 hours of porn daily. By compulsively watching porn for such a large amount of time (e.g. 6 hours),which is watching far more porn than they needed, their body creates a resistance against watching porn again. A hatred will be created towards porn in their mind. Also, the porn addict is not allowed to cease watching porn when they want. This method forces them to watch porn for a fixed amount of time. As time goes on, the hatred towards porn will increase inside the porn addict’s mind, and this hatred is used to break their pornography addiction completely. After a certain point (usually a couple of months), the porn addict is allowed to stop watching porn.
I approached this method with great hope.
This method works, but only for a limited period of time. I could resist a relapse for a much longer time than the first method of breaking a pornography addiction.
But, after a certain amount of time, a relapse occurs. Because ‘visual sex’ is a deep thing, creating hatred towards porn works only for a short time. After that, the love for porn comes back.
The ‘best’ method to break pornography addiction
I stated the two core techniques which are used by almost all of anti-porn materials above. All materials use these methods. The only difference is that they use it differently, and in different combination. However, the fundamentals are the same. One anti-porn material may tell you to install a porn filtering software, and another may tell you to divert your thoughts to other things. The fundamentals are same. Both are telling you to use willpower or force to break a pornography addiction, which fall in first category I mentioned.
After wasting lots of time by experimenting with these methods, I realized that these methods will never free me from porn. I was desperate to find a solution. I tried to buy into it, so I can use other people’s experience and findings, but unfortunately I found NONE.
I thought a lot, and I investigated a lot. I read all the psychology books I could find. But, even after researching a lot, I found no clear idea on how to effectively break a pornography addiction.
Finally, I decided to study other people, the people who are not porn addicts. I researched their lifestyles and their stress coping methods. How do they manage without porn? This was my question for years and I observed them a lot. This study gave me some interesting findings and I tried to use these methods in my personal life. Finally, I discovered how it worked.
I observed and studied both the lives of a porn addict and a person who is not. I used ordinary people as sort of test subjects. Luckily, I was also a counselor for years, so reading into people was not tough.
I found that there are certain “root causes”, which differentiate a non-porn addict from a porn-addict. I also found that there is no way to break a pornography addiction without eliminating these root causes. I experienced a significant difference in my attitude towards porn while eliminating these root causes.
I practiced these findings, and this experimentation with myself gave me lots of new insights.
Ultimately, this experimentation made me a 100% porn free person. It gave me a great sense of accomplishment and satisfaction. This is what led me to start quitporn.net. What I post here is my past journals, in which I wrote years back when I experiment with different methods.
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